At OTS Magazine UK, we take pride in bringing our audience exclusive conversations with trailblazing voices, and this collaboration with Champions Speakers, is a testament to that commitment. As Europe’s largest keynote speaker bureau, Champions Speakers shares our passion for amplifying voices that challenge norms, spark meaningful dialogue, and inspire change. Over the coming months, we will be bringing you some powerful stories, empowering our readers with insights from some of the most influential figures across various industries.
In this powerful and thought-provoking Q&A, we sit down with Michelle Visage, a trailblazing female empowerment speaker and fierce advocate for the LGBTQ+ community. Best known for her role on RuPaul’s Drag Race, Michelle has spent her career breaking down barriers and challenging outdated gender stereotypes. Her voice resonates far beyond the runway, encouraging women and LGBTQ+ individuals alike to embrace their strength, stand tall in their truth, and lift each other up. In this conversation, Michelle opens up about the importance of inclusion, the damaging effects of toxic masculinity, and why supporting one another, especially as women, is the key to real empowerment.
Q: “RuPaul's Drag Race has challenged traditional ideas about gender. Why is it important that we keep breaking down gender stereotypes?”
Michelle Visage: “It's important that gender stereotypes are tackled continuously because if we're not on top of it, we're not understanding that there's more to life than the binary. So, it's not for the people that are in the know; it's more about educating the people that aren't in the know or need to be educated. And it's doing it through love and compassion and understanding instead of through hate and saying, ‘You have to accept this.’ I think if we explain to people what's going on, they'll be more open to it.
There's so much more than just male, female, boy, girl. There always has been. We've just never had a ballsy enough society to take ownership and to talk about it and to allow people—and allow themselves—to be who they are. I know that as a kid, I remember a local person who was, back then, considered a cross-dresser. And I was so enamoured with her. Like, I couldn't wrap my head around it. I was young—I'm talking six, seven, eight years old.
And my mother would say, ‘Don't stare, look away.’ And I was like, ‘But it's really cool!’ Like, there's a person here who's very hairy, wearing heels and a very bad wig and a dress at the local delicatessen getting a sandwich. And I'm thinking, ‘This is really cool!’ Like, I don't know what it is, but it's different and I want more of that. So, I think from an early age, it spoke to me, and I think I've learnt a lot along the way.”
Q: "Why do acceptance and inclusion matter? What are some potential negative impacts when inclusion is lacking?"
Michelle Visage: “To be accepted and included—it sounds really easy, but it’s not. Some people within your own race, within your own gender, within your own community, for whatever reason, usually come down to self-loathing, have a hard time accepting and including people. Full stop.
A lot of women don’t accept or include other women. A lot of gay people don’t accept and include or lift each other up within the community. It’s so important that we stop that now, especially for those two groups—women and the LGBTQIA+ community—because we have fought so long and so hard to be where we are now. To tear each other down and not lift each other up is doing a disservice to all of our ancestors and all the trailblazers before us.
Women worked really hard — just to get us to be able to vote, let alone to run for President of the United States or Vice President. It’s so unbelievable to me that women are almost raised to be catty, to tear each other down. Their man cheats on them, and they blame the other woman instead of blaming the man. It’s very eye-opening. And it took me many years to realise, ‘Oh, women don’t want to support women. Women want to tear each other down.’ The very term ‘being catty’ comes from that. The feline. You know what women’s privates are called; it’s all related, you know what I mean? I think that we need to start including and accepting and welcoming other women into our pack, into our group.”
So, let’s learn how to lift each other up through communication, support—even people you don’t know. That’s why I often say to people who are online, if they say to me, ‘I don’t have a family. I’m not loved,’ it’s like, ‘I love you.’ And when I say, ‘I love you,’ I really do. I can’t hug you. I can’t be with you. But I truly do love you for who you are. And everybody deserves to feel that.”
Q: "Drag plays a significant role in challenging toxic masculinity. Why does this matter?"
Michelle Visage: “Well, toxic masculinity has been something that has not only kept the LGBTQIA+ community down but also women. If you think about women who have been abused, whether it’s mental or physical or both—emotional—all of it. We start making excuses for those men. And society as a whole has told us, ‘Well, he’s just had a bad day. Let them take a bath. Let me get him a drink. Let them cool down,’ or ‘I’ll give him my body,’ whatever it is to make him feel better. Instead of making us feel better, we’ve been trained to accept them as the superior.
Toxic masculinity says women are not hot unless we’re thin and have big boobs and a juicy booty and a tiny waist. That’s not reality. Most of us aren’t born that way. And when I mean most of us, I mean 99% of us are not born that way. 98% of us can’t get there without a doctor.
So, for us, that’s not fair—that they get to call what’s sexy and what’s not sexy. Or after the age of 30, we’re thrown, kicked to the kerb, and of no need anymore. They don’t get to tell us that. Not at all. We get to rise up and be the strong women that we are. And we need to tell ourselves that we are valid enough and important enough and matter enough to have a partner that supports us.
And that’s really what toxic masculinity looks like—when they tell us we’re not good enough and we believe it. That’s where the toxicity is. If they tell us we’re not good enough and we carry on, we’re not accepting their toxicity. But for them to be able to think they can tell us—to me, that’s the danger.”
Q: "Empowering others seems to be one of your strengths. How do you do it?"
Michelle Visage: “I think when it comes to empowering myself or empowering others, I think it comes from confidence. I know it sounds weird because you think it's knowledge or education or wisdom. I think it comes from confidence because I think if somebody asked me for advice and I give them advice, if I'm not confident about the advice, they're going to be like, ‘No thanks, I'm OK.’
But really, I'm confident about it because I believe in it, or it's worked for me, or I've seen it work for others. So, if I'm going to give advice, it's something that I know. And if I don't know, I'll say, ‘Well, maybe try this.’ And sometimes when I give advice and I know that I'm right, I know that what I'm saying is right, the person's not ready to take that move, pull that trigger, because it's too much.
They'll say, ‘I'll never be able to do that. Nope, can't do it.’ And I'd say, ‘Come on, you can. I'm telling you; this is what you need to do.’
So, I think being confident is a good way to support others and be there for others. And for me, humanity matters. I really do care about the people who are hurting. Believe it or not, I'm not emotional in a way. I'm not a big crier, but I am an empath in ways that I can feel what another person is feeling right away. I know exactly when something's wrong. I know exactly when they're not happy. I don't know what that sixth sense is, but it's there. And sometimes I can't fix it.
But I can tell that person, ‘I'm here for you. You might not want to talk about it, but I'm here for you.’ So, I think opening up and being there for another person but also being confident and being strong in your convictions, is the best way to empower somebody. Letting somebody know that they have the power. They have it. We all have the power to get what we want, to be treated the way we want.”
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This interview with Michelle Visage was conducted by Megan Lupton.
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Cover Photographed by Suki Dhanda
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